for Jim Beam to come roaring through the door and scream “YOU ARE A FUCKING DISGRACE” at me for last night. 

lets see

-got my head wrapped in fucking electrical tape. pain in the ass. 

-pondered furiously why I had chocolate powder all over me. not what it sounds like unfortunately. 

-killed a bottle of burbon. fucking classy.

-attempted to annoy everyone by asking if I was being “redneck enough” to drink from the bottles. succeeded.

-called everyone I could think of in my contacts list. horror show. i am honestly so sorry. (pfft, no i’m not)

-told my mom I didn’t need a ride because i was “drunk. in a happy way”.

-filmed Rev laughing to himself in the corner. cackleing ensued.

-called dominos but never received food. interesting.

-played the points game with krzys. i won.

-proceeded to laugh at Krzys because he was stuck with three couples and two other guys.

-tried to make a torch out of matches. it worked actually.

-threw sparklers off the third floor balcony. they go out when they hit things, it’s lame.

-posted incredibly stupid things on facebook.

-project M was officially unaborted. 

-woke up with a text from my sisters friend asking if my sister was alive.

-gaby is alive. somehow. 

-bacon doesn’t cure hangovers for some reason. i’ts sad really. 

-it is currently 7:00pm and i still feel like total shit.

-drunk phone calling people is now officially called “dick clarking”.